Love-Take 1

Love is a funny thing. There are a lot of different kinds of love. Right now I'm talking about friendship kind of love, which is sometimes simpler and sometimes much more complicated than romantic type love.

When I moved into my new place, I had two roommates who I didn't see very much. I stayed back in my deluxe bedroom suite, content with my turtle and private bathroom. It's not that I didn't want to befriend my new roomies; I talked to them, and quickly realized that we were nothing alike. Especially the one I saw the most. She went to school to do hair and does it as a side job. She is very into sports but also very unsure of herself and covers it up with a lot of talk. She acts knowledgeable about a lot of things, and offers advice and opinions that I never ask for. Not long after moving here I thought-I am not living here long. I need new roommates. Cause that's what I do. I judge, and then attempt to flee.

My other roommate left and a new girl moved in. She's the one with the dog. She's also 19 and also went to some sort of beauty school. Wants to work at a spa. She wears pink and dresses up and has missionaries and in all other ways seems the complete opposite of me. My hair dresser roommate started to seem like best friend material in comparison to this one. And I thought-I really gotta get out of here. I do not belong here.

I had no desire to hang out with them, and felt no insecurities about them not liking me. I didn't care if they did; I didn't like them. Isn't that a great way to see people? I even thought of how smallcomb would cope in this situation. She would love them. She would try to help them with the constant boy drama, as well as help them be stronger in the gospel, instead of judging them for their weaknesses. Ah, but that's smallcomb. I will never be like her. I am a jerk. Didn't my mission teach me that?

But then a funny thing happened. This aggressive little 19 year old forced us to go out to eat for roommate bonding. I resented it. I tried to get out of it by saying it was too expensive. I had no desire to go, and felt offended by her "manipulative" ways, as I saw them. She was always asking what I was doing, where I was going. Apparently she thought we should always be together and be aware of what's going on. Like I thought, when I was a freshman, ten years ago. Why didn't she see that we would never be best friends? That we were nothing alike? That I sort of disdain her way of living?

I don't know why, but she didn't see it. And she didn't get the vibe I tried to put out. We went to dinner, at the Brick Oven, of all places, which I hate. And it was fun. And then we went home and watched American Idol together, which I also have hated in the past but am now addicted to. And we have watched other things, or sat around talking, or gone to church activities. We plan on making meals together occassionally, and share each others successes and heartbreaks. And where before it was always awkward and uncomfortable with roommates, it is now home. We share a blanket on the couch. We complain about boys or work. I still feel like neither one of them listens to anything I say, and they have no comprehension of what I do all day when I'm not here. But when I am here, I am among friends. Yes, friends.

And I realized that she isn't trying to control me. She's trying to love me. And I'm finally letting her. And its bringing me closer to my other roommate. And I look forward to seeing them sometimes. I look forward to watching Idol and laying around at our newly instated "book club" where girls just come over in their jammies and we eat snacks and read books. I really love these girls, and see how they are amazing at what they do. And that they are great because they are unique, just like I am. We are nothing alike. We never ever will be. And that's okay.

Isn't love a funny thing?